Internet, 2...me, 1

Thanks to spoiler-free posts, I've been shielded from most of the Brawl flood.

Then they go on to articles that speculate features/characters/items that are NOT in the game.

I give up.

This is gonna be a long month...

Zero Punctuation: Resident Evil Umbrella Chronicles

Not forgetting that it's Lazy Wednesday once again, here's Yahtzee's take on Umbrella Chronicles for Wii. Just to be on the safe side, I'm gonna rank this as NSFW. There's some censorship, but not enough to cover the vulgar humor that resides within.

Controlling your video game "excitement"

Do video game bloggers carry no remorse? Frankly, I can't understand how people can willingly expose themselves to spoilers for a game that has yet to be released here in a month just to post on their site and attract more traffic to their gaming blog. News has been flooding everywhere of Smash Bros Brawl spoilers that I've officially given up grabbing random screenshots online, for fear that one leak may find its way to me. I've even stopped going to certain sites, simply because they can't help but post what the public wants, which is everything Brawl at the moment.

Sure, you can say that we'll eventually play the game and find them out ourselves in time...but there's still a majority of us who love unlocking extras on our own without the extra guides and spoilers.

This is almost annoying as seeing a person purchase a game AND its strategy guide at the same time. It's like buying a lunch and then immediately taking a dump, just because you can't stand the hour-long enjoyment of eating a satisfying meal and the 2-3 hours of digestion that follows.

No need to rush it. This shit's gonna come out eventually.

I'll "final smash" YOU if you ruin it for me!!

Because of the month-long delay, the release of Super Smash Bros Brawl in Japan this week is going to have a severe impact on my internet browsing. In the next few days, things may be revealed, and screenshots may pop up. I just hope sites are mindful when posting spoilers. In the meantime, I plan to shield myself with class and games.

For 4 weeks.

I swift punch to the face of the first person who spoils any of it for me.

Does that mean it's LESS than a month away?

If you're in Japan and you're picking up Super Smash Bros Brawl this week, I have nothing but scorn and envy for you. We westerners still have a full month until it comes out here. Well, technically, it's only February, and everyone knows that's not a real month. =P

Rant on posting spoilers....part 2!!

Okay, does anyone know the meaning of "spoilers" anymore? I go to my two favorite gaming blogs and I find them both posting picture spoilers of the complete fighter roster of Super Smash Bros Brawl right in plain sight!!

Regardless whether it's fake or not (in this case, fortunately, it's fake), that doesn't excuse the act of posting something so visually blatant as the first image someone sees when they visit your site!!

Oh, and to all who say people take spoilers too seriously? You damn right we do!! There are people that enjoy a good game and good story, and want to actually want to play the damn game all the way through. Call me crazy, but I think people enjoy unlocking things on their own instead of having a stupid blogger telling you what to expect in the end.

Oh, we shouldn't be looking up stuff online if we don't want spoilers? Are you saying we shouldn't look up info online at all anymore?? Sites like these are popular because they're constantly updated, and we are a generation on a "need to know" basis. Posting spoilers/rumors without notification to the reader almost makes the site no better than the local tabloids. It's not like we go to some specific site for spoilers and, hopefully, find some actual, factual news posting amongst the rumors.

The bottom line is, no one wants to post something that'll ruin the surprise for everyone else...at least not without the viewer's consent. As long as everyone follows some basic rules, everyone should have a good and spoiler-free time.

Oh. My. God.

Super Mario Bros 1-1 level stage in Smash Bros Brawl. Nuff said.

Zero Punctuation review: The Witcher

You guys are in for a treat. Today on Lazy Wednesday, Yahtzee rips a new one on The Witcher, and it's damn funny. Why? Click the NSFW video to check it out!!

Oh, and the dubbing of the "Painkiller" footage has its moments...but I'm just guessing Yahtzee is just killing time for his short impressions of The Witcher.

Patapon FEVER at $20!!

Finishing Loco Roco couldn't have come soon enough. Patapon's coming within a month's time, and it's gonna retail at $20?? Yes, despite Brawl falling to March, February's shaping up to be a good month for video games.

Hey! Who messed up my solar system model??

When you've played games as much as I have, you develop a more refined taste of what games to buy and enjoy. Which is why most of the time, I don't go nuts over every video game release that occurs each week.

Of course, there are the few occasions, like this week, where the planets align perfectly and shine a path to the sheer awesomeness of those few anticipated titles that receive my full attention.

Advance Wars: Days of Ruin and No More Heroes are set for release this week, and I'm eagerly looking forward to both titles. The first is a nice, darker sequel to one of the best military-strategy games to come out for Nintendo, and the second ironically brings out the hero out of an otaku-driven person in a very artsy backdrop.

The planets would've aligned next month as well, if one of the two titles I was expecting didn't slip from its release date...

1980s trend revamped in Brawl: stickers now rule!

Since the announcement a while back, I've always thought the Sticker Collection add-on was ridiculously lame. I mean, at least with trophies and CDs, I can collect a virtual figurine collection or listen to classic Nintendo game soundtracks...but stickers? C'mon! I don't have a Panini sticker book anymore...

But all that changed from crap to awesomeness in today's Smash Bros Dojo update.

Basically, to sum it up, stickers can adjust character stats by applying them to your character's trophy. This is only applicable to the single player mode, but hey...originally, most people thought a sticker collection is just a sticker collection.

This is absolutely cool on Nintendo's part, and ties up an otherwise needless feature. Now I'll collect as many stickers as possible!!

Clever, Nintendo...next thing you know, assist trophies might be clues to hidden characters' identities.

How 'bout it, Nintendo? Am I right?

The immaturity of high kicks

After yesterday's post, I kept thinking, "where have I seen this picture before?"

Ah yes, the latest Street Fighter 4 images.

I like Link's composed expression during the situation, as opposed to Ken ogling Ryu's nether regions like a slow-motion train wreck.

I know I should be more mature about these things...but I'm not. Take this other image from some Street Fighter Online game in its Beta form...

Loco Roco...finished!!

I gotta say...Loco Roco came off as one of those games that really didn't feel like a game. I mean, there's a truthful beginning and end, but overall it felt like the equivalent to a nice day at the park. I'd definitely would like to play again just to collect more things, but it's had its day in the sun, so to speak.

The one thing that pissed me off the most, however, during the game wasn't your arch enemies the mojos, but rather the spikes that litter the worlds. Mojos just suck your loco rocos one by one, while spike balls knock the shit out of your cluster. But despite that and the fact that the game's fairly easy, the puzzles they lay out are a challenge in themselves.

I'll say this - that's probably the most use those left and right shoulder buttons will get in its entire lifetime.

Zero Punctuation review: Crysis

Wow...when the Yahtzee video review has NOT been posted yet until now, you KNOW it's a "Lazy Wednesday." Enjoy!

She's a man, baby!!

Today's Smash Bros Dojo update talks about the return of Sheik.

And balls.

This screenshot was begging to be ridiculed. I wonder who can fight Sheik on equal terms?

Super Mario Galaxy...revisited

I know I still have tons and tons of games to finish, but there's something about Mario games that make me want to finish collecting all the stars. Plus, with Mario Galaxy, there's an extra bonus after collecting all 120 stars. (Spoiler: You get to play as Luigi.)

Now that I've collected 120 stars, I wish I hadn't.

Thanks to the bonus, it makes you want to play it all over again! And while this is not the first time I've reported such a situation, this time I wouldn't mind playing the game over again. The goals (despite sometimes being extremely short) are quick and easy to accumulate in a short span of time and making it less of a hassle to play. But that's another 120 stars all over again! Thanks for the reward and all, but c'mon...really??

Well, I can perhaps persuade my wife to be my Player 2 this time, despite her frantic wand-waving style. I mean, I found all 120 stars already - how bad can she mess me up?

I'm still not getting a PS3

In light of breaking news this past week, I'm still willing to wait out to see who will dominate in the format wars. I'd like the reason for me to buy a new console to be some game that I can't play otherwise. Movies will always be second to games when it comes to these major purchases.

A dark moon is rising over Brawl...

I wish Snake's sm-ass-h move had a different camera angle.

Phoenix Wright: Trials and Tribulations...finished!!

Wow, had to dust off my "finished" stamp for a moment there...been a while since I used it. But the Phoenix Wright trilogy is finally over for me. Throughout all 3 games, the stories have been enticing, and the numerous puns and jokes still carry with it its own brand of enjoyment. Overall, the third installment wraps up everything with a nice bow AND gives you pie ala mode with an extra helping of AWESOME STORY!!

What excites me more than these nicely (but sometimes convoluted) stories is the fact that the new Justice installment, Apollo Justice, is just around the corner. Around February's corner, that is. I'm so happy that Capcom realizes the resounding success of these courtroom/detective dramas enough to quickly bump the release of the next game so fast.

Zero Punctuation review: Silent Hill Origins

Oh yeah, lest I break apart from my weekly regime, here's Yahtzee's review of Silent Hill Origins. Personally, I've never played the series all too much, but I've heard about its scare-you-until-you-shit atmosphere and the whole when-your-radio-screeches-static-you-run-like-shit, and I'm all about a good story.

Then again, I'm all about laugh-my-ass-off reviews about games I've never played, too...

Nintendo knows what my wife likes

With just a little more than 2 weeks left until its release in Japan, the Smash Bros Dojo is running out of weeks in which to reveal new information. And, of course, if it knows any better, it wouldn't reveal any more secrets or hidden unlockables left for the player to find on its own. But you'd think they'd stop any more big reveals like new challengers.

Guess they still have more. Another challenger approaches...Oliver of Pikmin fame!

If the Animal Crossing levels doesn't appeal to her, then this squinty, chubby fellow with his mini-minions just might!

On a side note...is that Pete from Animal Crossing flying in the background??

I mean, they're both cartoon court dramas...except one's funny

Most Adult Swim shows don't really cut it for me, and I'm typically a big cartoon guy. It's just that sometimes their brand of humor is just so off-putting that it scares me what their actual audience is really like to enjoy such random mayhem.

Then there are some that gradually grows on you like some ugly strain of athlete's foot. Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law is one of those shows. And now, thanks to its popularity, it is now a game on multiple systems under the Phoenix Wright genre of courtroom drama plus detective work.

Now I haven't watched much Harvey Birdman, but I do know that he defends (successfully or terribly) popular cartoon characters of the past. And, from the game's screenshots, it looks like the game will now include video game characters into the storyline.

I'm definitely looking forward to giving this game a go, especially since I've (nearly) passed my Phoenix Wright trials (currently near the end of the third installment). Though, what will satisfy my "Objection" phase?

Patapon makes me want to lead my own eyeball army

So okay...when I fell off the PSP radar, I missed out on one of the more imaginative titles Loco Roco. Now that I have the PSP Slim and the game as a Christmas gift, I now see what I missed - an interactive, musical piece of art.

I mean, right off the bat, the music is just freakishly adorable - like "the most cutest babies trying to sing 'Silent Night'" adorable. The music in the game is just that lovable. And it only compliments the very simple-yet-fun gameplay where all you need are the top trigger buttons to tilt the world. Add in the solid and playful graphics and eyeballs on everything that moves, and you have a game so sweet you can get cavities from prolonged exposure.

My positive impressions for this game is a good sign as well, since the same people behind this is also soon releasing Patapon, a rhythmic game based on your drum beatings to lead a hodgepodge of tiny warriors into the battlefield. Seriously, we honestly need more surreal games that don't rely so much on graphics and mature content, and less of those that celebrate kicking people when they're down.

I got to level 12 AND sent the Browns to the Super Bowl!!

This is merely an observation, and shouldn't be thought about too long, but portable gaming has actually improved my...um, game.

Well, let me clarify. When I say "improve my game," I'm really saying that it has allowed me to play games that normally I would not have time to play, for one reason or another.

What are those reason? Why, I'm so glad you asked!

1. There's only one (cable-connected) TV.

Since my upgrade to an HDTV, I've taken great pains to make my gaming experience on this freakishly large screen an enjoyable one. However, it's also the only cable-connected television in the house, and, bring the considerate one in the room, I'd hate to hog it all up just for video games. I thoughtfully allow the misses to watch some TV while I whittle away a few minutes time on my DS/PSP.

Well, okay...maybe it's not all "sunshine and lollipops," but bottom-line - I cut back on TV gaming. That's not to say I don't play on it at all; only when time permits. Sometimes my wife will watch something on TV that doesn't appeal to me, so I switch on some personal games to keep me occupied.

2. I can bring my game anywhere. ANYWHERE.

All my portable entertainment is always on me wherever I go. I'd elaborate more, but just believe me that wherever I am, you can assume that my games are there with me.

3. Sleep mode is a godsend.

Trying to level up my party? Stubbornly playing some hard level over and over until I pass it? Need to run out and do some errands? No problem! Like magic, I can set my DS or PSP to sleep mode and go back at a later time to finish! Of course, I could do that with a regular console system, but because of Reason #1, it wouldn't be played as frequently.

Disgaea PSP is a perfect example of game progress. In a much smaller amount of time, I've gotten farther in that game on my PSP than on the PS2, simply because I can play it more frequently on the go.

Have any of you guys found portable gaming as your salvation?

It's been only 3 days...

For a brand new year, it's off to a slow start. First, the Smash Bros Dojo site is taking a week-long (and well-needed) break from updates for the new year. Secondly, it's Thursday. Thirdly, it's...Thursday.

I guess the double post plus update yesterday wore me off.

Zero Punctuation Review: Mario Galaxy

Oh, and don't think I didn't forget that today's Wednesday. Yahtzee's back and kicking off the New Year with his video review of Mario Galaxy. Go get your fix here and make a resolution to check out his other reviews.

My first "oops" into the New Year

Okay, my very first New Year's resolution? To never miss a post again like I did yesterday. Man, I was completely out of it yesterday. All I remember were bottles of champagne, a sea of balloons, and a fluffy cat to ring in the new year.

But seriously...in addition to the typical traditional resolutions we make each year, I have a couple of video game resolutions to propose:

1. To finish more of my already-owned games.

Not only does finishing any game that I already own is good on its own, but playing my games keeps me from buying new ones. And as of late, I'm not too good at rectifying this. Hopefully in the new year, I can be more dedicated to at least finishing the story.

2. Never get any old game at full price.

Had to change it to "old" game, since there will always be some "must have" games that I would break the rules for. But for the most part, most games undergo some sort of sale during its release week, so hopefully this will apply to new games as often, too.

We'll see how the new year pans out. What are your video game resolutions?

[UPDATE]
Forgot one more:

3. Remember...it's "resolutions," not "revolutions."

Because, y'know...as much as I love to flip around, I really should make resolutions for myself. (Thanks, shadowxeneth!)