Friday, September 7, 2007

From cute to puke in 6 seconds flat

My wife, Heidi, does not have Gameritis. If she does, it's a very "cute," not "acute," case. And no, that's not a clever play of words to make me sound like the Wit King of Kingdom Witty, between Joke Town and Pun Village. But I digress...If the game has something cute, my wife will likely give it a chance.

It is this reason that she decided to start playing Yoshi's Island DS.

I mean, the game's full of children's drawings, all of which attract her attention as she gleefully plays through each level. But the first one to make her unleash her super "awwwwww" was this character:

I can understand the appeal she has for this nameless kangaroo; it has huge eyes, a large nose/face/head/something, and a ridiculously gaping pocket for Yoshi to ride in. Oh, and it jumps. A lot.

Me? It looks like a sock puppet with legs, but what do I know - I'm a guy.

Oh, and this kangaroo only jumps. In certain bonus levels. That's all.

I'm sure that if this single-purpose character talked, it would've pushed its cuteness level beyond measure and absolutely make Heidi's day. Like, if it said "hello" in a deep, elongated baritone. Or, if it did a silly little dance. Or, if it said "hello" while doing a silly little dance.

For me, I'm wondering if that's really a pocket or not. It would be pretty foul if Yoshi jumped in, only to be shot up in the air by some noxious methane gas. Or worser still. Like "goatse" worse. Don't know? Don't ask. And don't look it up during work.
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